Manifesto

In 3 months, I will be the big 3-0. While people might approach this date with horror, I'm filled more with reflection of what the last 30 years has taught me and how I want to move forward for the next 30.  People may see turning 30 as a loss of the fun and carefree life of their 20s - I see it as an opportunity to live life better (and to be older and wiser).

Two years ago I read an uber feminist book called Cunt- a Declaration of Independence.  While I didn't always see eye-to-eye with Ms. Muscio about  much that she wrote, the one thing that always stayed with me was her manifesto.  The author felt every woman should write her own manifesto filled with your beliefs and views about life, love, religion, and politics.  More importantly - if you believe something, are you doing what you can to live it?  The last year has got me thinking about a lot of things - where do I stand on what issues - what is important to me - and really what isn't - so the time has come for me to write the beginning of my own manifesto-30 statements for 30 years.  My first and most certainly not my last. 

In no particular order:


1.  I believe that everyone is created equal unless you are an asshole.  Doesn't matter what race, gender, religion, or sexual orientation you are, if you are an asshole you have no entitlement over anyone and you won't have my respect.
2.  If you don't believe everyone regardless of race, gender, religion, or sexual orientation is equal, then there is no room for you in my life, so don't be surprised if I defriend you on facebook or stop hanging out with you.  If you still believe this in 2013, then you are an asshole and should see #1. 
3.  Women need to be kinder to one another.  Stop the bitchy cattiness and learn to be supportive of your sisters.  Girl empowerment and all that.  Because there are many moments when we're living in a man's world still and we need to work together to be equal (see #1).
4.  Being mean on purpose to make yourself feel better is just not nice.  I remember being in 3rd grade at a Christian Bible Camp and some girl my age had the nerve to say something about me being fat in my swimsuit.  Really - I was 8 - and that memory has stayed with me.  So stop being a bully. 
5. That being said - I want to stop judging people before I even know them.
6.  I like the idea of having faith and believing in something bigger than you more than I do religion, so I won't necessarily be religious.  
7.  And just because someone has religion, it doesn't make them nice (see #1).
8.  But I do respect people who have religion because most of them have faith. 
9.  I also think you have to have faith in yourself and in others.
10.  Apologizing for doing or being wrong sucks but it is necessary.
11.  I realize I am wrong sometimes.
12.  I believe in supporting locally when & if  I can.  As a food scholar, I think its fair to say that supporting local farmers is important, however, I also once heard another food scholar say that sometimes, timing, convenience, and circumstance might not always make it possible, so you have to also be realistic - it would be very hypocritical of me otherwise.
13.  I do believe that the food system is messed up (this includes immigrant work force)    and want to support those that work to change it (see #12) even when I don't know how. 
14.  I think animals should be treated humanely and will buy humanely when I can.  I will work to support those that feel the same.  I will not however, be a vegan - because let's face it - I love steak.
15.  Mother Earth is important -so I will always continue to do my small part.
16.  Beyonce, Britney, and JLo - not good role models for women; Eleanor Roosevelt, Francis Parks, Rosa Parks - good role models for women. 
17.  I am a feminist and I believe in all ranges of feminism.  All women can be feminists if they choose to be.
18.  Outside of a few songs from the 80s, I actually don't like Madonna (gasp!). Okay, so more a fact, but whew, I had to get that off my chest. 
19.  I want to be remembered more for my brains more than my brawn (and my looks).
20.  Today is the day I start eating for the rest of my life.  As I have over-indulged in many things for the last 30 years, its time to stop that nonsense. (#12)  Smaller portions too because let's face it, too much of a good thing is too much.
21.  I will not continue to judge my value or my life by others.  They are not me and I am not them.  I realize that I am often envious of other people while shortchanging what it is that I have.  I'm sure at the heart of it, there is something I have that others don't.  No one's life is perfect. 
22.  No one's expectations are as important as my own.
23.  But I need to not expect so much from myself and be realistic.
24.  If I ever have kids, I refuse to "genderize" or "stereotype" them.  If I don't, well hopefully I'll rub off on my niece and nephews.
25.  I will praise my niece and nephews for being smart more than pretty so they learn to not judge themselves on looks alone. 
26.  Especially my niece because I really hate how women are objectified.  And how young girls learn from an early age that being "pretty" is important.  Picture an 8 year old getting called fat by another 8 year old because the definition of beauty is what you look like and not what type of person you actually are.
27.  If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all - smart words - I wish I could learn to live by them.
28.   No more assholes in my life.  Period.
29.  I won't try to force my beliefs onto anyone - I might voice my opinion and try to educate them, but I won't disregard their feelings about things (unless #1 applies to the situation).  I also will be more educated about something before getting into full on - well, from my point of view . . . . .
30.  No one should have to settle for less than they deserve.  This comes especially in the forms of relationship, friendships, and partnerships.